Nothing

Something for Nothing

“You know,” said Charlotte, “I’m going to do it. I’m going to write a book about what our lives
are really like.”
              Frankie screwed up her face. “But nothing ever happens to us.”
              “I know!” said Charlotte excitedly. “That’s the point. It’ll be, like, a searing document of today’s youth and how incredibly lame our
lives are!”
              Frankie paused. “Am I going to be in it?”
              “Hello? You’re my best friend. You have to be in it. This is a true story.”
              “Can’t you make something happen
to me?”
              “No! Only the truth!”
              Frankie groaned. “Oh my god, I’m
bored already.”
              And that was how Nothing began.

 

 

Now, you’re probably thinking to yourself Huh, those girls are about to get abducted by psychopaths. Or invaded by hot aliens looking to impregnate humans because their planet has recently been overtaken by bad and unhot aliens. Maybe you’re thinking One of those girls must have superpowers and the other must be having a tender but illegal affair with her Chem teacher who is also her neighbor and whose wife was paralyzed by a stroke. Or maybe you’re thinking Those girls are destined for a love triangle! Whoo-ee!
              Because, obviously, you can’t write a book about what really happens. What really happens is nothing. No one would write a book about
that.
              I did.

 

Nothing will be coming to bookstores near you on September 5, 2017.